I AM LOVE

I swore I'd never fall in love again
Like I had done something so wrong
Like I had betrayed myself
Like I had turned on my own heart

The feelings that I had for you were true, are true
Except, I don't know what I really feel anymore
I don't know if I'm comfortable feeling for you
I'm not sure if I know what I feel at all

You wanted me to be honest
But you were never honest yourself
Or is it that your honesty and my honesty are just so different
I could question that all day

I lay alone, staring at the ceiling
Wondering how I got myself in this again
This love thing that never is equal
Someone always loves more than the other

Someone always does more than the other
Gives more, says more, is more
And the other usually thinking that they are being equal
Usually receiving more, but thinking they are giving as much

One sided relationships are my specialty
Because I am always the better friend
I am always the better spouse
I am always the better lover

Daughter of misunderstanding I have been
Trying to catch myself in this race of uncertainty
Wondering how I got so far ahead of my feelings
Hoping that one day it will all come together

I am not the lover I use to be
I am not the girl you met back then
I am not the child that was born into nothing
I have grown into something much more than myself

I have grown into much more than you thought I would be
Much more than you could have ever imagined
Much more than expected of me
Much more than I can handle at times

My love is not dangerous
It is not foolish or weird
I am not doing thee most
I am not over-expressive

I am me
I am unfolding before my own eyes
I am learning the hard way
I am taking you on a journey with me

I am not in love
I am love
I am cupid with love arrows
I am valentines and chocolates

I am sweet dreams and early morning kisses
I am romantic dinners and proposals
I am holding hands and singing chords
I am secrets and bff's

I am freedom to live
I am laughter and tears
I am smiles and emoticons
I am warmth and I am sure

I AM LOVE

I do not love too hard
I am not ashamed as you are
I am not afraid of being broken
Because I am not in love, I am

I AM LOVE