What exactly do you say when you've been away for so long? I'm not sure. Things change with the passing of time. I've been in love, lost love and fallen all over again for an old flame. It's funny how the heart works. It's funny how a person can change in just a years time. I'm glad to be back, except I'm not back and as I use to be. I'm a whole new me and I want to share that with you (the reader).
You see, the truth is that I've been hiding... I've been hiding behind other people's view and opinion of me. I've been hiding behind others dreams and expectations of me. And you know where hiding has gotten me? Nowhere at all. I've been mentally stuck in the same place for years. All of the dreams that I have for myself have been locked away and forgotten. My clothing line at a standstill; machines, fabric, equipment locked away in storage. But that is my passion. My talents have gone to waste. My love for singing, dancing, and acting are just a memory now.
How do I get the things I've lost back? How do I move forward in my life and not be afraid?
I just woke up today and decided to move. I decided that I will not let illness or opinion stand in my way any longer. I just can't do it any more. Because the same people that are watching, judging and waiting or me to make a mistake are going on with their lives and worrying what I think about them at all.
It felt good to open my eyes this morning and feel like could honestly care less about what the next person feels or doesn't feel about me. You can't live your entire life for everyone else. Trust me, you will lose your true self in the process. Now of course, I'm speaking generally when I say I don't care what people think. Of course there are people who's thoughts and opinions matter, but my "overall" can't be dictated by other people.
With that said, I am going to live. I am going to smile. I am going to sing and dance. I am going to make new friends. I am going to love so hard and not be afraid. And I hope you are all with me, because this will be a fun ride.
Mwah
-Schye
No comments:
Post a Comment